Fonzie of the Week #21: Adam Richman, Host of Man vs. Food
Let’s get the basics out of the way, Adam Richman, host of Man vs. Food is the Fonzie of the Week. Why? Because Man vs. Food is probably my favorite show that doesn’t feature nerd-slash-super spies, creepy magical islands or Kiefer Sutherland breaking the Geneva Convention. The show usually follows a simple formula: 20 minutes of Mr. Richman salivating over and/or sampling the most awesomely delicious pig-out foods a single city has to offer, followed by 10 minutes of him attempting an “eating challenge” that involves enough food to feed a large village for a week, or enough atomic heat to power a small city for a day…and sometimes both. Make no mistake, Man vs. Food is why the terrorists hate us. It’s not to be missed, readers.
But really, Mr. Richman is Fonzie of the Week because I think he should be my new best friend, and I’m going to blog that impossible dream into reality. Actually, I’m not even going to call him Mr. Richman anymore – best friends don’t use last names. So, Adam, if you’ll allow me, I’d like to make the case for us becoming best buddies. I think you’ll agree it only makes sense. Here goes:
- We have similar backgrounds: Adam has a master’s degree from the Yale School of Drama. I have a bachelor’s degree in Theatre from Penn State. True, his theatrical schoolin’ is way more impressive than mine, but that’s okay by me: we have documented proof that he can eat more impressively than me, too. Every hero needs a sidekick, and I’m willing to play second fiddle. Think it over, Adam.
- I don’t judge – I keep pace! Let’s face it, Adam basically gets paid to eat tangible years off of his lifespan. The gastronomical feats of strength exhibited on his TV show are not for the faint of heart. They’re not for the strong of heart, either. In fact, they’re generally bad news for anybody who possesses a heart. And still, I’m yet to watch an episode and not think “I’d like to try that.” Eating pounds of food at a time is more fun with a friend, and I’m most definitely applying for the job.
- I can make Man vs. Food better: In the episode set in Philadelphia, Adam participated in a cheesesteak-eating challenge with Tony Luke, of Tony Luke’s. And with all due respect to Tony Luke, Jr., who makes a fine steak (and an appreciation that the Travel Channel ventured beyond 9th and Passyunnk), I could have told Adam that the best steaks in the city are actually found at Sonny’s Famous Steaks. And back when I lived in Philly, I was neighbors with its owners! I could’ve set up an awesome challenge for him at a superior cheesesteak joint. And I also would have saved him from putting American cheese on his steak. Yuck. I don’t mind that he passed on the Cheez Whiz (I’m a provolone man), but American cheese on a steak is just plain wrong. I’d be the best thing to happen to that show since Prilosec.
- I know CPR. It’s worth noting, since our friendship will be at least partly built on a solid foundation of overeating to crazy extremes. It’s really not really a question of if I’ll need to resuscitate: it’s a question of when I’ll need to resuscitate. I’ll also keep plenty of antacid handy. I’m thoughtful like that.
So, Adam, I think it’s clear what needs to happen here. I look forward to taking up residence on your speed-dial. I know you’ve got lots of friends, but can any of them say they’ve named you “Fonzie” on a blog that has tens – nay, dozens! – of readers? I didn’t think so. Save me a spot at the counter, good buddy. I’ll bring the napkins.
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